Jennifer Gilmore is one of the many who found that adoption is not always easy.

Most of the time, adoption organizations want to sell you the happy story. They want to you to think that it’s all going to work out perfectly and it will happen faster than you’d imagine. But any honest person in the adoption industry will tell you that adoption is not the easiest process to go through. Some adoptive parents are matched and placed within a month, while others can wait for years. Some adoptive parents have a great experience and wonderful relationship with birth mothers. Other adoptive parents have been scammed by people posing as expectant birth parents and tried to their wits end. Jennifer Gilmore, a writer and novelist from New York, is just one of many adoptive parents who have witnessed the harsh reality of adoption.

In her book ‘The Mothers‘, Jennifer details her family’s journey through their first attempt at domestic adoption. 

Matched, Placed, Broken

Jennifer and her husband were matched for adoption five different times. One of those matches involved placement, but ended in a heartbreaking surprise. Finally, Jennifer Gilmore became a mother to a child she could forever love, nurture, and know. Jennifer wrote about the grueling process of adopting in the Atlantic. She also had an interview adoption the adoption process with NPR, which you can read or listen to now.

If you’re interested in learning more about Jennifer Gilmore, visit her website.

Our Perspective

We understand the gray area of adoption. We know that adoption is not black and white. It’s an incredibly complex idea, surrounded by an unfortunate overabundance of trauma on all sides. But what we can do to heal that trauma and change adoption is promote education and acceptance.

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